Lately I have been thinking about how the will of God doesn’t get easier. The will of God gets harder. Because the harder it gets, the harder we have to pray. I thought leaving the states for God’s Kingdom would be easier this time around. I mean “I’ve been here, done this”, I thought I got it- right?
Well to be completely raw with you guy- I am anxious about going to Spain. I am scared of God’s unknown… why this time? I have come to the realization that I think it is because for probably the second time in my life (the other being going on The World Race) I have chosen to trust Him and let go of all of my control over my future. completely all of it.
I definitely struggle with wanting to control things to guard my heart and prevent hurt or an outcome I haven’t prepared in advance for. God was able to strip me of this when I went on the race and I know He can do it again. He continues to put me in situations that stretch my faith and as my faith stretches, so do my dreams. and God wants all the glory.
I have been getting asked what specifically do I feel called to going into G42. I would be lying if I said I had an exact plan from the Lord. On the race I learned a lot about my identity- who I am in the Lord and what kind of gifts He has given me. I love working with the little humans and I also absolutely love working with the women in jail- because of the state of brokenness they are in. While I was living in The Philippines, the Lord had also placed on my heart the idea of an art school/therapy class for children in poverty. Beyond this, I have no idea what God has in store for me over this next season and the where? when? or what? for after G42.
Mark Batterson in The Circle Maker, says “We want God to go first. That way we don’t get our feet wet. But it’s often our unwillingness to take a step of faith and get our feet wet that keeps us from experiencing a miracle.”
I’ve taken the leap of faith. I’m not only praying for God to reveal more of Himself to me while in Spain, but I expect him too. I haven’t just been praying- I know I will get an answer. because He is good. God wants us to trust Him in areas beyond our ability and sometimes our faith is all we have left, we have dealt all the other cards.
“These are the words of him who is holy and true, who holds the key of David. What he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open. I know your deeds. See, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut.”
Praying hard is declaring and knowing that God WILL fight our battles for us. It is beyond our control. Sometimes God leads us down a path where we have nowhere to turn but to Him. I am not going to be afraid. I am going to stand still and wait for His answered promises.
**UPdate on funds: I have raised $2,092 so far!! only $4,208 to go. Don’t forget to join me in the GIMME FIVE challenge… if all my friends donated just $5 I would be fully funded! we can do this! check out on the link above^^